A polar bear goes to see a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist peers at him over the desk and says: “Well, the good news is, you’re not bipolar.”
I came to the hospital because I accidentally swallowed invisible ink. I’m still waiting to be seen.
What is the difference between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the end of his paws, whereas a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
Do you know how to make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
Doctor: You have debilitating cramps because your body has run out of magnesium. Me: 0mg
What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I’m not sure, but the flag is a big plus.
What did the horse say to the one-legged man? “How are you getting on?”
What do you call a vampire antelope? Vlad the impala.
The last time The Irish Times had one of these competitions I submitted 10 of my best jokes. I was sure that one would win. But no pun in ten did From the Irish Times
The Undamaged Chasuble Link fixed. Thx JA
The hands were likely nailed palms down (against the cross beam) as shown by blood flows over the top of the hands and outside of the arms. Thus, the arm musculature was twisted for hours while bearing a terrible weight, leaving not one spot on the sacred body screaming in pain, as if that were possible
The Crucifixion prophesied in Genesis Chapters 5
The Genealogy of Noah in Genesis Chapter 5 (from "The Bible: An Extraterrestrial Message" by Chuck Missler, khouse.org). The ancestors of Noah are recorded in Genesis 5. There are a total of 10 names, each with a specific Hebrew meaning. The English translations for the Hebrew words are recorded above from top to bottom.
Hebrew English Meaning Adam (is) man. Seth Appointed Enosh Mortal Caanan Sorrow (but) Mahalalel The Blessed God Jared Shall Come Down Enoch teaching (that) Methuselah His death shall bring Lamech The despairing Noah Comfort
"Man (is) appointed mortal sorrow, (but) the Blessed God shall come down, teaching that His death shall bring the despairing comfort."
This is the Gospel of Jesus Christ, rendered in the names of the ancestors of Noah! Nobody can choose the names of their parents or grandparents! This is one of the many proofs of the supernatural authority of the Bible.
Barabbas was the "scapegoat" pardoned and released into the wilds while Jesus was the sin offering used to sprinkle the Mercy Seat once a year.
Almighty, holy and eternal God and Comforter, invigorate my studies and be a lamp to my path so that I may establish myself and others in thy holy faith. JDG
My Pillow CEO Mike Lindell : Drops A BOMBSHELL: ‘This Is It… New Election Fraud Evidence Will Put Trump Back In The White House By August This Year’ Even if conclusively shown that the election was stolen, it is unlikely to remove Biden. If removed Harris would be prez
The crew of a Dutch cargo shift have been airlifted to safety after they were forced to jump in the North Sea to escape the sinking vessel. All 12 people on board the heavy-lift vessel Eemslift Hendrika were rescued by the Norwegian coast guard after the ship started to list near Alesund. Eight were hoisted directly from the deck by a helicopter at noon on Monday but four initially remained on board to try to stabilize the ship. They were then forced to jump into the sea with the huge cargo ship teetering on the verge of capsizing. Link
CDC study confirms vaccine effectiveness for RNA COVID-19 vaccines. These findings indicate that authorized mRNA COVID-19 vaccines (Pfizer, Moderna), are 90% effective in preventing SARS-CoV-2 infection, regardless of symptom status, among working-age adults in real-world conditions.
When a family is cursed